Paul Wilczynski's Observations

Can a woman lessen the chance of being raped?

I recently ran across an article entitled NJ College Sends Students Wrong Message About Rape which equates a lecture on preventing sexual assault with blaming the victim. I posted it on Facebook and said "I'm sorry, but I don't really agree with this article. Of *course* the blame for rape lies with the man. But you won't convince me that the way a woman acts or dresses has absolutely no effect on the possibility of her being raped."

First, let's start with a definition of rape from dictionary.com: "the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse." Wikipedia goes on to say that it also includes a sexual act against a person "who is incapable of valid consent, such as one who is unconscious, incapacitated, or below the legal age of consent." For purposes of this discussion, I'm only talking about a man raping a woman.

Let me get a few points that everyone agrees on out of the way. Rape is always wrong. The victim is never at fault - fault is always 100% with the rapist.

Now, let me say that I believe there is a continuum of people who rape. On one end of my continuum is the amoral psychopath whose mother abused him while he was growing up and whose anger results in raping random women. On the other end is a college man who invites a woman up to his room and who has sex with her against her will. Both of these meet the definition of rape, but I would argue that the circumstances are quite different. My original comment in Facebook ("But you won't convince me ...") does not apply to the first case, but does to the second.

The only question being discussed in the article and by me is can a woman lessen the chance of being raped? This question is generalizable into the question are there any actions someone can take to lessen his/her chances of being harmed through no fault of his/her own?

Take a few other examples of this generalized question.

• Is there any action I could take to lessen the chance of my being injured or killed in an airplane accident (as unlikely as this ever is to happen)? Yes: choose an airline which statistically has a lower percentage of accidents.
• Is there any action I could take to lessen the chance of my being injured or killed while legally walking across a street? Yes: look both ways before crossing.
• Is there anything I can do to lessen the chances of being mugged at night? Yes: park in a lighted area, walk with someone else, etc.

At one of the extremes I noted above, I'll make my point by considering as an example people at a frat party at a university. (Let's assume thousands of frat parties with the same situations because I'm talking about relative likelihoods.) I'll assume that most of the males have been drinking. I won't make any assumptions about the women drinking. Let's also assume that, for the most part, attendees are meeting for the first time.

Let's consider 2 types of women: type one is quiet, not particularly outgoing, and conservatively dressed. Type two is outdoing, flirty, and wearing sexy clothes.

I would argue that a woman falling into type two is more likely to attract the attention of men, is more likely to find a man she finds attractive, and therefore is more likely to find herself in a position where intimacy is possible. (Also more likely is the possibility of being drugged or fed too much alcohol.) In a certain number of these situations, sex will end up occur without the woman's consent.

Does this mean a woman "asked to be raped"? Of course not - that's a ludicrous thing to say. Does it mean that being raped was her fault? Of course it doesn't. At the least, it probably does imply that one should be a bit more careful with someone she's met for the first time.

So yes - I argue that a woman can lessen the chance of being raped. Should she have to take any actions to prevent being raped? Absolutely not - she she never, under any circumstances be raped. But rape, like crossing the street, is a fact of life. And there are things one can do to keep oneself just a bit safer.

posted by Paul Wilczynski @ 1:40 PM